Lame Sports

Flashback - February 28th, 2008 - Brett Favre Not Sure What to Eat for Breakfast

 By Rusty Weiss

Brett Favre is continuing a seven year trend this offseason, not divulging to his employers one way or the other as to his status for the upcoming season.  Wisconsin is all abuzz.  Will he come back for another season after last year’s renaissance?  Or is it time to call it a career?  Favre’s off-field indecision has become as much legend as his on-the-field prowess.

That indecisiveness came to a head this morning, as Favre once again paralyzed his team and his teammate’s goals by holding up the line at the Packer breakfast buffet.  Sources indicate that Favre had been weighing his breakfast options for nearly an hour.

Lame Sports reporters flooded the scene seeking comment from the Packer front office brass.

New Packers president Mark Murphy believes Brett Favre will return to the omelette section of the buffet for another look at the Gunslinger Omelette, aptly named for the 38 year old quarterback and his sometimes reckless style of play.

“My guess is that he’s going to come back to the omelettes,” Murphy said in hushed tones. “The cooking staff has gotten a lot better around him and they’re in a position to really do great things this morning.”

“I think he still enjoys omelettes, and he has a passion for it, but it’s not as easy of a decision as some people might think,” Murphy said.

Ryan Grant, the Packers running back, chimed in, “There’s the French Omelette, but Brett’s never really been a French kind of guy.  He just never surrenders man, you know?  No way he waves the white flag and gets the French Omellette.  I just know he’ll fight his way through this and pick the perfect breakfast.”

Linebacker A.J. Hawk added, “Just last week we had Al (Harris) and Charlie (Woodson) defending the buffet line in a dime formation.  Brett just ate them up like a couple of rookie cornerbacks, jukin’ and jivin’ his way, carving through the D like they were butter.  When he turned and fired his bacon slices onto the tray, zip, zip, zip, it was a sight to see.  I tell you brother, Al and Charlie didn’t look like Pro Bowlers that day.”

After a tense 67 minute wait, Favre finally made a decision, indeed going for the Gunslinger Omelette.  As Favre cashed out however, the breakfast omelette slid off his tray, landing cleanly into the arms of a hungry Corey Webster of the New York Giants.

“Damn, I did it again,” Favre said.

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